Vilken är din favorit på bash.org?

[SunTzu]

http://www.warpdrive.se

 

Svensk version

[HeyJohan]

SunTzu: Tack! Jag hade tappat bort den adressen och var på väg att bli vansinnig i mina försök att komma på den.

 

Mvh Johan

[serenity]

http://www.warpdrive.se/?35122

http://www.warpdrive.se/?3937

http://www.warpdrive.se/?8816

 

[jezaja]

Kan gå i god för att denna är sann iaf, jobbat på samma bensinmack förut:

http://www.warpdrive.se/?5475

 

På kvällarna kommer de mest konstiga människor till bensinmackar för övrigt, lite som ett vuxendagis.

[ziddax]

<ikkenai> i don't have hard drives. i just keep 30 chinese teenagers in my basement and force them to memorize numbers

[StarfiGhtr]

Bloodninja for the win!

 

http://www.bash.org/?104383

 

BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.

bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.

BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.

bloodninja: Me too baby.

BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.

bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.

BritneySpears14: Hey...

bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 chicken of the Infinite.

BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.

bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of the Beyondness.

BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.

bloodninja: Don't f*ck with me bitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.

 

http://www.bash.org/?642195

 

bloodninja: I turn you around to lick your asshole.

bloodninja: I pry apart that battleship you call your ass.

bloodninja: I see poo nuggets hanging from the hair around your ass.

sweet17: WTF?!?!?

bloodninja: They stink really bad.

sweet17: OMG STOP!!!

bloodninja: I start to get fed up with your ugly ass

bloodninja: I tear off your wooden peg leg.

bloodninja: I ram it up your ass.

sweet17: YOURE A FUCKING PYSCHO!!

bloodninja: Then I pour hot carmel over your head.

bloodninja: And turn you into a fucking candy apple…

bloodninja: I kick you in the face!

sweet17: FUCK YOU DICKHEAD!!

bloodninja: The celluloid from your cheeks hits the side of the cabin…

bloodninja: Your parrot flys away.

 

http://www.bash.org/?101881

 

j_gurli3: thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.

bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.

j_gurli3: haha, ok lets go.

j_gurli3: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.

bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my

breeding territory.

[HeadLess-]

Kan man annat än älska bash? satt 8 timmar om dagen i 2 veckor på den sidan när jag hade praktik för nåt år sen

[DaPine87]

Trots att jag är en nörd har jag aldrig lyckats finna mig helt till rätta med IRC. Det är dock sjukt användbart och används som alla vet hur mycket som helst.

Självklart skrivs det ibland saker som man kanske ångrar eller som bara av sig självt blir hysteriskt roligt.

 

Massor med citat från IRC har samlats ihop på http://www.bash.org

 

Det är helt vansinnigt beroendeframkallande, men guldkornen är så många att man lätt spenderar timmar där.

 

Kom igen, jag vill veta era favoriter. No limits

 

Mvh Johan

 

Tack för länken

[Henkeman]

http://www.warpdrive.se/?35122

 

Skulle precis tipsa om Warpdrive och speciellt den där länken, så sjuuukt bra

 

den där "You don't know Jack Shit" finns som flashanimation vet jag, roligare då än som text

[Hjort]

Kan man annat än älska bash? satt 8 timmar om dagen i 2 veckor på den sidan när jag hade praktik för nåt år sen

Vad ska det här säga oss om HeyJohans jobb?

[ades_va]

Okej, det blev visst ganska många, men detta är iaf några av mina favoriter..

 

* ab is away - gone, if anyone talks in the next 25 minutes as me it's bm

being an asshole -

<ab> HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS

 

<Paradox> So, guys, I have some news.

<Paradox> I know I usually don't talk much about stuff unless it's solid, but this is interesting, and I think you should know.

<Paradox> I just got an E-mail about an interesting proposition.

* volsung_ perks up.

<Paradox> Apparently, there are lesbians that want my 'hard cock.'

* volsung_ flips Paradox the bird.

<volsung_>

<Paradox> They want it 'now,' apparently, so the timetable is somewhat limited.

<volsung_> Are you going to just take their offer as presented, or is there an opportunity for negotiation?

<Paradox> I'm not sure.

<volsung_> I'm sure your hard cock is in great demand. An exclusive deal might not be in your best interest.

<Paradox> Last time I got an offer like this, there were some catches.

 

Den här får mig alltid att skratta..

<cassius_clay13> so I was with my friend bryan the other night in a bar

<cassius_clay13> well he got really drunk and said he was gonna puke

<cassius_clay13> so i helped him walk to the toilet

<cassius_clay13> all the stalls were occupied

<emoti_conartist> lol

<cassius_clay13> bryan is a rugby player... so a big guy

<cassius_clay13> so he fucking KICKS one of the stall doors open

<cassius_clay13> and there's this guy in there taking a shit

<emoti_conartist> hahahahahaha

<cassius_clay13> and bryan throws up ALL OVER HIM

<cassius_clay13> then (this is genius) bryan thinks 'oh shit... if i were taking a shit and someone came in and was sick all over me, i'd want to fuck him up... so i'd better hit him first'

<cassius_clay13> so he fucking SMACKS this guy in the face

<cassius_clay13> and runs away

<cassius_clay13> imagine being that guy... WORST NIGHT OUT EVER

 

* Spoon casts Wall of Silence

*** Spoon sets mode: +m

<Goku> why?

<Spoon> Because exo went insane

<Goku> no, he just brought his insanity up to another level

* Sentinel checks..

*** Sentinel sets mode: -m

<exogen> THERE'S BUTTER ON MY FACE!

*** Sentinel sets mode: +m

 

<samsim> I heard about this guy who broke into a lion's den at the zoo

<samsim> and got mauled

<samsim> and people were talking about how there should have been better defences put up to prevent people getting into the cage

<samsim> a friend of mine suggested setting up some kind of deterrent

<samsim> for example, putting some sort of fierce animal in the cage, which would attack anybody who climbed in

 

<Cotton Mouth> How do you describe the color blue to someone who is blind and has never seen a color before?

<NickBlasta> 0 0 255

 

<Rin> 65 peolpe killed in Canada by guns last year

<Rin> 63 in UK

<Rin> 64 in Australia

<Rin> 11,456 in USA

<Ram> we win!

 

Och denna är med då jag själv gör samma sak varje gång jag försöker läsa den..

<screamingholt> At that stage was n6r0a33y -5ng5ng 6f 00y d5a3 6n s60e 06f6s 'scr-[t 0eds and weed

<screamingholt> Damn...Fn key

<redcloud> ROFL.. i thought that was an attempt at 1337 speak

<redcloud> i was trying to interpret it

 

(Thoth) Funniest toilet graffiti this evening: "I fucked your mother!" underneith: "Dad, you're drunk! Go home!"

 

<niceboy19> i'm german

<Evilbert-> don't worry i won't mention the war

<niceboy19> what do you mean with that

<niceboy19> you just mentioned it

<Evilbert-> you started it

<niceboy19> i didn't

<Evilbert-> Yes you did! You invaded Poland!

 

<Huge_Spatula> I wanted to submit a mistake from "The Man in the Iron Mask" to http://www.moviemistakes.com that said, "Watch the scenes that feature Leanardo Dicapprio carefully. He can't act."

[virre86]

http://www.warpdrive.se/?35122

 

Skulle precis tipsa om Warpdrive och speciellt den där länken, så sjuuukt bra

 

den där "You don't know Jack Shit" finns som flashanimation vet jag, roligare då än som text

 

Du råkar inte ha någon länk till den? Var min favorit så skulle vara kul att se

[poker_oscar]

<Beeth> Girls are like internet domain names, the ones I like are already taken.

<honx> well, you can stil get one from a strange country

[Henkeman]

Du råkar inte ha någon länk till den? Var min favorit så skulle vara kul att se

 

Jag kan ju alltid ta och googla på "jack shit flash" och kolla på den översta, http://home.pacbell.net/diana_do/knowjack.htm

[virre86]

Du råkar inte ha någon länk till den? Var min favorit så skulle vara kul att se

 

Jag kan ju alltid ta och googla på "jack shit flash" och kolla på den översta, http://home.pacbell.net/diana_do/knowjack.htm

 

Kunde jag tänkt på själv

 

Tack så mycket ändå. Sjukt kul

[eThor]

Denna e favoriten från warpdrive

 

<+wot> jag är helt seriös nu, och jag vill inte att ni larvar er nu. vem FAN här har beställt en 2 meter hög trästaty föreställande lenin i mitt namn från kanada?

<+wot> fick en lapp om det idag, den står och väntar på bekräftelse.

<+wot> jag har inte köpt den, inte nån i min familj heller.

<+wot> en 2 meter hög jävla trästaty

[Dollarturist]

Den här fick mig att le lite för länge sedan när jag såg den. Finns säkert bättre. Försök att se "idioten" (egentligen bara en teknikglad yngling) framför er!

 

#18851 + (88) - [x]

[meow+] haha, laptop+wlan+plastpåse i duschen = <3

[dumprr] eh är inte det lite riskyy??

[meow+] nejdå, jag har ju plastpåse .D

* Quits: +meow (meow@*********.se) (Read error: Connection reset by peer)

[helos+] ahahahaha :D:D

[dumprr] lol mcgyver strikes again

[Loveless]

Kom på ett par gammla favoriter

 

http://www.bash.org/?287414

http://www.bash.org/?587801

[Andersson]

<iFx|shade> this guy aidan was aruging with this chick emma at tea

<iFx|shade> and shes like saying it wouldnt hurt that much getting kicked in the balls

<iFx|shade> and he goes spread your legs then and ill kick you in the balls

<iFx|shade> and shes like i dont have balls

<iFx|shade> and he goes who are you trying to kid with a mostache like that

<iFx|shade> and she got up and left

[Suppe]

<blazemore> LITTLETON, Colo. - Colorado officials plan to try a 15-year-old boy as an adult for allegedly offering a Sony PlayStation to have his aunt killed.

<FlipTopBx> is it modded?

[EL_FishkO]

http://www.warpdrive.se/?20373

[eurythmech]

<NES> lol

<NES> I download something from Napster

<NES> And the same guy I downloaded it from starts downloading it from me when I'm done

<NES> I message him and say "What are you doing? I just got that from you"

<NES> "getting my song back fucker"

[hajen04]

I helped the EMTs at a car wreck and got blood all over my arms and shirt. It looked like I murdered 20 people with a fork... anyway, I walked into a convieniance store down the street and said my girlfriend needs a tampon. The guy at the counter was mortified.

[Rille]

<Thelizno>: ni hokkispelare behöver bara pengar till gayporrfilmer och snus

<Byborna>: hehe

<Byborna>: jag snusar inte

 

Detta citat blir dock extremt mycket roligare om man vet att Byborna är Kenta Nilssons son Robert Nilsson som nu spelar i NHL.

 

http://www.warpdrive.se/?8568

http://www.hattrickworld.com/main.asp?action=viewArticle&articleID=70

[Blaabar]

 

<VolteFace`> don't you hate it when you shit on the floor, and you can hear it fall but you have no idea where it actually landed, and spend like 5 minutes looking for it

<peng> ...

<peng> what?

<VolteFace`> oh shit

<VolteFace`> don't you hate it when you DROP shit

 

 

<Fashykekes> Capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my uncle Jack off a horse.." and "I had to help my uncle jack off a horse.."

 

 

 

<Raven> I tried setting my hotmail password to penis.

<Raven> It said my password wasn't long enough.